When you are in love with someone, everything feels great. We often tend to ignore some red flags in our relationship. This is because our love overpowers everything.
Even if when are things are right in front of our eyes, we tend to oversee them. It is truly said that love makes you do weird things.
If you sit silently and think for a while, you will somehow find certain points or situations that will make you realize that something is wrong in your relationship.
However, this will only be if your partner is toxic or not serious. If you have a loving and supportive partner, you have hit the jackpot.
Situations become worse when you are in love with someone who is already married. The relationship is already very sensitive, considering the fact that you are involved with a married man.
You need to be really alert when you are in a relationship with a married man. If he is truly into you, you will never feel insecure about the relationship.
Your gut will never tell you that there is something wrong in your relationship. However, when it does, you need to consider a few things.
We have mentioned 9 signs a married man is using you in this article. These points will help you to be sure whether it is a serious relationship or not.
Go ahead and read the points and decide for yourself whether the man is worthy enough for your love or not.
9 Signs That a Married Man is Using You
1. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: His Wife Doesn’t Know Anything About You
See, chances are that your man is going through some rough patch in his marriage life. Or he is planning to take a divorce. This is the reason why he is in a relationship with you, correct?
Also, it is quite understandable that he might not have shared about you with his wife at the beginning of the relationship. However, when you have to spend a considerable amount of time with him, he will discuss you with his wife.
Okay, he might not share everything in detail. But he can say that he is seeing someone. If he hasn’t done so yet, you need to really think about it.
This simply means that he is hiding the relationship he has with you. So, basically, he is having an extra-marital affair with you.
This also means he is not serious about you. If, somehow or the other, he feels his relationship will be caught, he will leave you.
For men like this, it is very easy to move from one woman to another. So it is better to take charge and confront him rather than go through a heartbreak later and weep for him.
2. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: He Makes Excuses Whenever You Ask Him About His Wife
This, too, is a way to get to know what kind of a man he is. If you find that he always makes excuses whenever you try to discuss anything about his wife, this can be a sign that he is in a casual relationship with you.
If this is the case, you will often find him diverging from the topic. He will be talking about some other things which may or may not make sense. Simply, his intention is to move away from the topic.
Also, whenever you express your wish to meet his wife, he will say that he is currently involved with some other work. Or that his wife is not in town or some other excuses.
Men like these are great at making excuses. Sometimes the excuse will also make sense to you. But think for a while, how can one make an excuse about the same thing again and again?
There must be some reason behind this, isn’t it? So, it is better to take a decision now regarding your relationship than regret it later.
3. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: Notice How He Talks About His Wife To You
This will help you to get an idea of what he actually thinks about you or women in general. Now you must be wondering how this can be, correct?
See how he talks about his wife. For example, if he says things like –
She is a very irritating woman.
A woman like her only deserves the worst.
She has done many wrong things to me.
My wife is a cheater.
Or similar other things. It is very likely that this is the way he thinks about women. So, if you all part ways in the future, it is very liley that he will talk about you in the same way.
See, I know it can happen that his wife might have cheated on him or done terrible things to him. But, a good man will never use such words to describe her.
He will not keep on abusing his wife and his marriage with her. Also, you are not even sure whether he has done these things to him or not.
He might be lying about it. Now imagine how many lies he must have told you in your relationship with him.
A man who lies so much can never be serious about a relationship. It is very likely that he is using you, and he is not at all serious about you.
4. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: His Friends or Family Aren’t Aware of You
See, if you somehow try ot make sense of the fact that his wife doesn’t know about you, you might actually be able to do it.
And there is a tendency of you to do so. This is because you might be thinking that maybe his wife might not approve of this relationship, his wife might do something against this relationship, and he is just trying to protect you.
Although this might not be true, you will try to make sense of this. Let’s say you did so. 
But think of this for a moment, how is it possible that not even a single member of his family or any of his friends do not know about you?
At least his close friends or one or two member of his family should know about you. If you haven’t met or had an interaction with any of his friends or family members, it is a clear sign that he wants to hide the relationship from everyone.
This also means that he is not at all serious about you – a red flag you shouldn’t ignore.
5. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: He is With You Only For Sex
Although I do understand if this is the case, and you find out about this, it is going to hurt you. After all, when you get physical with someone, it does involve a lot of emotions.
But if your partner does not feel the same for you, it makes no sense to be with him. Therefore, it is important for you to know and understand that he is not with you just for the sake of having sex with you. 
One way to find it out is to start noticing if he always asks for sex; it doesn’t matter if you are comfortable doing so or not. On some days when you are not in a good mood or not in the mood for physical intimacy, check what his reaction is.
Does he force you in some way or the other? Does he get agitated when you refuse to have sex?
A good partner will understand your mood and situation. He will not force you for anything. If he calls or decides to meet you only for sex, just leave him then and there.
You will also notice that he will more likely meet you on days when he knows that you are in the mood for sex. He will avoid you when you are having your menses. Because, usually, women do prefer to have sex during their periods.
So, tell me, what will you gain in a relationship with a man who is there for you only for sex? Today he is with you, tomorrow, he will be with someone else. Why waste your energy and time on such a man?
6. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: There is No Emotional Support From His Side
One of the most important things one expects from a partner is emotional support. We are human beings, and we do need support from our loved ones.
And if we are in a relationship with someone, we will obviously expect a lot of support from our partner. There is nothing wrong with it, trust me.
When you face any challenges, when things do not go the way you thought they would, you will want your partner to be by your side.
You would expect him to listen to you patiently, try to understand you and make you believe that things are going to be okay very soon.
But if the man you are in a relationship with does not do any of these, what’s the point of being with him?
If he doesn’t make you feel comfortable if you do not feel that you can discuss all the problems of your life with him, do you really think he deserves to be your partner?
If you feel that your partner often ignores your problems or tries to divert the topic whenever you try to discuss your problem with him, it simply means he is not in love with you.
When a person really loves you, he will be with you not just in your happiness but also through your times. It is obvious that he might not always give you the solution to your problems, but at least he will provide you with the emotional support which you need.
And if he is not able to do it, it clearly means that he is using you. There is no need for you to love someone who cannot even listen to your problems and comfort you. You definitely deserve someone better.
7. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: There Are No Efforts From His Side
What is the one thing which people who love us do? They make efforts. Efforts to make you happy in any way possible. And when it comes to the man you are in a relationship with, you will obviously want him to do things for you.
For example, celebrating your success, celebrating your birthdays, your relationship anniversary, etc. He will always try to make things special for you if he genuinely loves you.
He will do anything to make you happy and make you feel special. However, if you find that he is not doing the same, there is a high chance that he is not serious about your relationship.
Look for the following things –
Does your man try to initiate loving conversations with you?
Is he the one who tries to resolve a fight?
Does he apologize after fights or after he disappoints you in any way?
In order to make you happy, does he plan for surprise dates?
Does he celebrate all the wins in your life, even the small ones?
Is he the one who encourages you and believes in you?
Does he try to invest more in the relationship?
See, by all this, I do not at all mean that he should be the one doing everything. Of course, a relationship is not a one-sided thing, and it demands efforts from both sides.
You, too, should be making efforts in your relationship. But if you notice that you are the only one doing so, it is time to give it a thought.
If he doesn’t put any effort into the relationship, it implies that he is taking it casually. He doesn’t care about your happiness or bringing joy into your life. All he cares about is himself.
It is also very likely that he will leave you once he no longer wishes to be with you. This is why you should take this thing seriously and take a decision accordingly.
8. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: He Doesn’t Treat You As His Priority
Try to understand that this does not mean that he has to leave everything happening in this world and choose you over anyone and everyone.
It is quite understandable that he must have his family, friends, a job, his own personal space, etc. And as a partner, you, too, would understand this.
You should obviously not ask him to only prioritize you in life. But there are certain situations through which you can understand whether you are on his priority list or not.
You can check this by seeing how he treats you and if he cares about you being happy in life. A person who loves us not only cares about their happiness but also prioritizes your happiness too.
A person who prioritizes you will do the small little things to make you feel important. He will make sure that you are a part of all the special occasions in his life. At the same time, he will make things special for you.
Also, notice if he comes to you for advice or suggestions when he has to take an important decision in his life. If you are important to him, he will obviously share the important things about his life with you.
Also, your opinion and thought process in such situations will matter to him. This is because he understands that his life and decisions affect your life too.
However, he will only do so if he really considers you as his priority in life. If he does not feel that you are important in his life, he will not even bother about your opinions.
He will take all the decisions by himself without thinking if that is going to affect you in some way or the other or not.
So in your relationship, you know better whether he considers you as his priority or not. Also, if he does not consider you as his priority now, don’t be in the dilemma that maybe later, he will consider you as someone important.
No, this does not happen this way. If you are important to someone, you will always be important to them.
So think about your relationship and decide for yourself if your partner really deserves you or not.
There is no point in being with a man who is not concerned about your happiness. So I guess it’s time that you take charge and take a firm decision about your relationship.
9. Signs That a Married Man is Using You: He Does Not Talk About Future Plans
This is the biggest red flag in your relationship. By this, you can judge your man if he is just using you or if he really loves you.
It must have surely happened that you must have talked about your future plans with him. For example, how and when you both will get married., and about your kids, etc.
You must even get excited talking about the same, correct? And this should be true as well. After all, you are talking about a man with whom you want to have a future, correct?
So you would obviously want to discuss a lot of things with him. However, does he feel the same excitement or not?
Does he have the same happiness as you while you both discuss your marriage plans? If yes, good. This means that he is really serious about you. And he, too, just like you, wants to spend a life with you.
But if this is not the case, it is time for you need to worry about your future. If he gets irritated and asks you not to think about the future right now, this means he is not sure about you.
He might even tell you to enjoy the present currently and not worry about the future so much; however, is it really the case? Do relationships work like this?
It is understandable that he wants to enjoy the present, but if you are seriously in love with someone, you will surely want to have a future with that person.
You might want to marry after some time, but there should be no problem discussing it. If he gets irritated whenever you bring up the marriage topic or start talking about something else, it means that he has no intentions of marrying you.
It will not take him much time to break up with you then. The moment he starts feeling that you are becoming very clingy and you are thinking about the future a lot, he might leave you.
So before he does this, you should think and do something about it.
What To Do When You Know That a Married Man is Using You
First, do not overlook the red flags in your relationship. I know and understand that you are in love with him. But please do not act like a fool.
When we are in love, we often ignore things and feel that we might be overthinking them. But please do not feel the same.
It is your life, and you have all the right to know whether the man you are dreaming of in s future with actually loves you or not.
If you feel the above points in your relationship, it is very likely that you are trapped in a relationship where you are being used.
So it is better for you to accept this fact and make a decision regarding the same. It is better to leave him and focus on your life.
Of course, it is going to hurt, and you will have a tough time dealing with it. However, it is for your own good.
Remember that you deserve a partner who is actually in love with you and is not using you in any way.
We hope you found this article helpful. If so, you can also check articles like – 11 interesting facts about Scorpios and 10 signs you are too busy for a relationship.
